10 reasons why Football is better than American Football

American football is America's favourite sport but with the World Cup looming, I just have to drop some knowledge on you people. The United States football team is currently 4th in the FIFA rankings, but I'm sure more Americans than not will have trouble naming even one player on the team. So my aim here is to illustrate just 10 of the many reasons why football is far superior to American football and thus encourage you to get with the proverbial program. And I speak here as a huge fan of both.

Before I begin, honestly, what the hell is soccer? It's a word used by two countries (including Canada) who really don't play the game themselves. So please, it's football.


(I) Football is Beautiful - There is art in football. The way a player eludes another or the way he runs with the ball, passes it to another or flicks it has no comparison in American football. It's an art, a dance even. Case in point: Pele. Or almost any Brazillian for that matter. And yes Maradona is great too, but not as great as Pele (sorry to all the rabid Argentine fans out there). But American football is all about precise actions. You need to throw the ball down the field in this exact spot with perfect timing. Or you need to run this route and look back at this exact moment. Yes there are instances of art sometimes in a running back here and there like a Walter Payton or a Marshall Falk, but on the whole there is no real comparison when it comes to the art of a football game. This art ensures that the NFL will never have a Pele or a Maradona.

Pele

(II)Pele - The world has seen no greater star than Pele who scored two goals to help Brazil win a World Cup at just 17. He is also the youngest player to ever be in a World Cup final and the youngest to ever score in a World Cup final. Pele scored over 1000 goals in his career and won three World Cups in his career. Forget Muhammed Ali or even Michael Jordan. The NFL, as I said, does not have and will never have a Pele. I once asked an American who is widely regarded as the best American football player to have ever played the game and he couldn't answer. And the reason I asked him was that I had never heard anyone being named as the best ever. To all those who have never seen a tape of Pele playing I say this to them: you have missed half your life. And I know some completely delusional rabid Argentine football fan is going to say that Maradona was better that Pele. In your dreams, I say, hombre.

(III)Longer Seasons - English Premiership is 38 games long meaning that a team plays all other 19 teams in the league twice. However in the NFL regular season, teams have a 16-game schedule. And even though there are 34 teams in the NFL, teams must play other teams in their divisions twice. So at the end of the Super Bowl, there will be many teams that will have never faced off. That alone is out of the ordinary.

Thanks to MattJ who reminded me also of the FA Cup, Carling Cup, UEFA Cup and the Champions League. There is so much football throughout the year. And please don't anyone tell me anything about college football (American). The BCS system in college football does nothing but rob good teams of a chance to play for the title.

Ed Hochuli

(IV) Get In, Get Out - There's hardly any starting and stopping and definitely no play clocks. Yes, the referee does blow his whistle every now and again and play is halted for a bit, but stoping the clock in football doesn't start yet another clock i.e. a play clock, that counts down till the next play must begin. There's 90 minutes of play plus a 15-minute half time plus (usually) less than 5 minutes of overtime per half. There is no three-hour game that American football is accustomed to. So no stupid yellow flags or 5-minute-long mantras from Ed Hochuli, who at times seems to like the camera more than the players do themselves.


(V) 50,000 Fewer Rules - I believe that football is a natural sport. Get the ball, avoid the other team's players and put the ball in their goal. Rinse and repeat. Of course there are a few other rules here and there, but for the most part a foul is a foul. How many rules does a sport really need? If it's not holding, it's play clock violation. If it's not that, it's pass interference or a false start or unsportsmanlike conduct, illegal pass, facemask, encroachment, ineligible receiver, roughing the kicker, roughing the quarterback, tripping, illegal contact, illegal formation....(you get my point)

What's the big deal?

(VI) NFL= No Fun League - Players are allowed to be human and even more importantly, group celebrations are not disallowed. It's not uncommon to see a player creep on all fours to the nearest corner flag and fake peeing on it. Surmise for the moment the magnitude of the fine that Paul Tagliabue would hand down. Remember that year when Randy Moss was fined $10,000 for only pretending to moon the Green Bay crowd? Just because you turn some summersaults or do the airplane with your entire team, this doesn't amount to taunting. I mean, are you five years old so you get pissed of when the other team shows how happy they are because they scored a goal? But everyone knows that when you take an overpaid, overly macho cry-baby and put him in a constricting spandex pants he ceases to be reasonable.

American Football's Origin?

(VII) Spandex - Spandex pants are for the ballet and for buffet day at Waffle House.

(VIII) One Team - In American football there is no offensive team and defensive team, special teams or brownie-making team for that matter . That adds up to a 53-man active roster when everyone's accounted for (not including the practice team). A 23-man squad can get any job done. How many serious football fans can name every member of their favourite team's squad? And having so many different teams on the field at the same time means that at no time are two quarterbacks on the field, or two kickers for that matter. It's a little odd to have starting players of opposing offensive teams never face-off for an entire game.

(IX) The World Cup - In its worst year the World Cup is better than any NFL season including the Super Bowl. It comes once every four years and there's nothing like anticipating a World Cup especially when you come from the smallest country ever to qualify.

(X) Sports on a World Stage - The World Cup is a worldwide phenomenon (And don't tell me anything about NFL Europe. NFL Europe is like the United States Cricket team - It might as well be non-existent. What, you didn't know there was a U.S. cricket team? That's my point exactly). When I say "worldwide" I don't mean in the same way that Super Bowl winners call themselves "World Champs". Canada doesn't even play in it and Mexico won't even bother, so how can you call yourself "world" anything. You're not even North American champs. But the worldwide phenomenon means that it's a known fact that workplace productivity takes a hit for the duration of the tournament.

Football is a worldwide game played by worldwide players even in the club stages. Football is the stage. This is the yardstick for sports supremacy. Not everyone plays American football, baseball, hockey or even curling, but everyone plays football; even the Americans. Think of this: when will we ever see the American football team playing another country in the Olympics? My team of statisticians says never.

All this ranting has got me thinking about American football though. I think I will have to post reasons on why American football is still a great sport.